Home | Save the Date Etiquette: 14 Do’s and Dont’s to Follow

Save the Date Etiquette: 14 Do’s and Dont’s to Follow

by Emma Arendoski
Published: Last Updated on

Want to make sure you don’t make any save the date mistakes? We’re here to help! Follow this save the date etiquette to ensure everything goes off without a hitch! We’re sharing the most helpful save the date do’s and dont’s to follow to avoid making any mistakes along the way. Join our list now for more tips to your inbox!

Are you new to the save the date etiquette world? Of course, you are!

No one, and I repeat — no one — knows if they’re sending save the dates properly until they’re faced with actually doing it themselves.

Most couples send save the date cards once (twice, if you had to send postponement cards).

save the date etiquette

by ellis

And if you’ve ever received a save-the-date card in the mail, you probably never realized how many save the date do’s and dont’s went into making it to your door with proper etiquette. :)

Earliy this week, we discussed this post on save the dates and then began receiving a ton of questions from you guys (we love them, so keep those coming!) But it made us realize we needed a solid Save the Date Do’s and Dont’s blog post to keep etiquette for 2021 up-to-date so you know exactly how and when to mail them out properly.

So, let’s help you win this whole save the date etiquette thing: you’ve got this! Let’s start with the number one save the date etiquette question: are save the dates necessary? And if so, when do you send them out? Let’s discuss it. Plus, we’re including save the date card examples throughout this post from Minted to inspire you. They have an amazing collection. Enjoy!

by christine taylor

Save the Date Do’s and Dont’s

1. Are Save the Dates Necessary?

Do you need to send save the dates? Do you need to send save the dates to everyone?

YES, and yes!

DO send out save the dates to guests.

And not just the guests whom you think will appreciate a save the date or live far away. Proper save the the date etiquette dictates that you send save the dates to ALL guests on your wedding guest list.

by morgan kendall

2. Are Save the Dates and Invitations the Same?

No, save the dates and invitations are two completely different things. Both are mailed, but they contain different information.

DON’T send save the dates instead of invitations. You’ll need to send them both.

by kelli hall

Think of save the date cards as an informal announcement of your upcoming wedding date. Invitations dive deeper into the specifics such as the host(s), venue(s), time, RSVP, etc.

by joann jinks

You can seriously have fun with it! Just look at this design:

by caitlin considine

Or this!

by jennifer lew

The save the date is definitely the less formal of the two, so if you want to show off a funny or playful side, now is the time to do it. (HINT: You can search funny cards here!)

3. What Should Save the Dates Say?

This is an important one: save the date cards shouldn’t be overly wordy, but you also don’t want to leave out important facts.

by lauren chism

DO include your names, the location of the wedding, and the wedding date on save the dates.

Yep! Here’s all you need to include on save the dates:

• Your Names

• The Location of the Wedding (city, state are fine for now — no need to give away specific venues yet!)

• The Wedding Date

It’s also a good idea to include:

• Formal invitation to follow

by april astudillo

4. When Should Save the Dates Be Sent Out?

When do you send save the dates for a wedding? Here’s the proper save the date etiquette for mailing them out:

• Save the dates should be mailed NO LATER than 6 months before the wedding

Planning a destination wedding?

• Send destination wedding save the date cards between 8 to 12 months before the wedding.

DO send save the dates within the proper timeline. DON’T send them out too late!

by joanna griffin

by joanna griffin

5. Does Everyone Get a Save the Date?

Ooh, this is important for save the date etiquette: YES, everyone gets a save the date! You only need to send one save the date per household.

DO send a save the date to everyone on your guest list. And DO send one card to each household.

But be careful here, as there’s one huge DON’T:

DON’T send a save the date unless someone is 100% invited to the wedding.

If you’re not sure, wait until your wedding guest list is finalized before mailing save the date cards. You can’t un-send a save the date. ;)

by itsy belle studio

6. Should Save the Dates Have Pictures?

Do save the dates have to have a picture? They don’t HAVE TO include a photo. Proper save the date etiquette dictates a save the date can include a picture, but there’s no hard rule that says you must include a photo. But you can/should if you have a perfect picture to share!

by everett paper goods

DO choose a save the date design you like best, whether or not it includes pictures (or a picture).

by genna blackburn

by susan moyal

by brianne larsen

by susan moyal

7. Should Save the Dates Match Invitations?

Ah, this is a biggie: do save the dates and invitations have to match? Consider the save the date as a less formal announcement. If your wedding theme, colors, and style aren’t finalized yet, it is perfectly fine if save the dates do NOT match invitations.

DO choose a tone and theme that will coordinate with save the dates and invitations.

For instance, if you know it will be very casual, choose a low-key save the date card. Formal? Follow suit with a more elegant design for your save the dates. But if you’re not sure yet, the big answer to should save the dates match invitations is no, they do not need to match.

If you are making everything more cohesive and coordinated though, it is extremely easy to have save the dates match invitations thanks to these styles at Minted. Once you find the save the dates you like, scroll down to find matching coordinates for EVERY PART of your wedding. Yes, invitations, RSVP cards, programs, menus, table numbers — everything! It’s so easy to have save the dates match invitations (along with everything else, to be honest).

8. Do Save the Dates Have to Be Formal?

Not necessarily. As we mentioned above, try to follow the formality of your save the dates along the lines of what you’re planning for your wedding. Your save the dates are a great place to kick off the fun of your theme, tie in your motif, colors, etc. if you have them already! Have fun with it.

DON’T stress about save the dates and how formal they are.

Your save-the-dates are also a great way to show off your personality, so have a little fun with it!

by mc designs

by mc designs

Should Save the Dates Be Addressed Formally?

Do save the dates need to be formally addressed? They are mailed, so they will need to be addressed; however, more informal wording is acceptable.

DO address save the dates properly; however, they DON’T need to be addressed formally as an invitation is. Here are some examples.

by christine taylor

by itsy belle studio

by susan moyal

9. Should Save the Dates Have RSVP?


DON’T include reply cards or RSVP details on save-the-dates.

10. Should Save the Dates Have Last Names?

It is a good idea to include your names, first and last, especially if you are not including a photo on your save the dates.

DO include last names on save the date cards.

If the design looks better with first names, that’s okay — just make sure your last names appear in the return address so guests know exactly who is getting married. :)

11. Should You Include Wedding Websites and Hashtags?

Yes! A save the date is less formal than an invitation, so…

DO include your wedding website address and/or wedding hashtag.

Now is a great time to use them if you have them! And if you don’t, be sure to get a FREE wedding website here.

by akgraphics

Need a wedding hashtag? Try this!

12. Should Save the Dates Include Registry Information?


DON’T include wedding registry info on your save the dates.

Your wedding registry information can be included on your website, but registry info, in general, should stay off of the save-the-date card. FYI: the only place your wedding registry is printed (besides your wedding website, if you do so) is on your bridal shower invitation (or as an enclosure in the shower invites).

Now that you know the proper save the date etiquette and do’s and dont’s, let’s talk about tips on addressing them, along with save the date card examples to inspire you.

You can browse a comprehensive collection of save the date cards at Minted here, designed with the latest styles, modern trends, and themes you love. Here are some of the most eye-catching save the date card examples of the season. To find out more, just click on the link underneath the photo of the card.

13. Can You Get a Save the Date Sample Before Sending?

To make sure your save the date cards will come out perfectly with your photo and information, yes, you can get a sample set to you before you decide.

DO get a save the date sample.

You can get a free save the date sample here for info.

get your sample kit here

14. Can You Send Digital Save the Dates?

According to proper etiquette, save the dates should be sent in the mail.

DON’T send digital save the date cards.

If you prefer digital cards, that’s up to you! But traditionally, sending them through the mail assures everyone receives them properly.

Save the Date Etiquette: Addressing

We mentioned one of the save the date DOs and DONTs is to address the save the dates properly, but you don’t need to be overly formal about it. If you shop save the dates at Minted, you get a huge bonus: free addressing on your envelopes.

This will help you to know exactly how proper save the date etiquette should be followed for addressing, given the examples provided. As a plus, the envelope addressing matches your save the date styles perfectly. One less thing you’ll need to worry about!

by wildfield paper co.

by wildfield paper co.

by wildfield paper co.

Save the Date Card Examples

To browse more save the date card examples, visit the collection here!

Happy Planning!


This is a post in collaboration with Minted.

This post contains affiliate links and we may make a commission on a sale at no additional cost to you.

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margareat Parisi June 7, 2021 - 4:17 pm

I keep asking if you can decline the invite on a save the date card. Do you wait for the wedding invite?

Emma Arendoski June 7, 2021 - 4:36 pm

Hi Margareat!

Yes, wait for the invitation to officially decline on the RSVP card. Great question! Hope it helps.


Comments are closed.

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