Wondering what to do for bridesmaids? How do you keep bridesmaids organized, and what are some bridesmaid activities you can plan? We’ll cover it all right here!
Did you recently propose to bridesmaids and now you have your wedding day crew? Congratulations! It is such an exciting part of planning your wedding.
As a former bride and bridesmaid several times — and serving as a Maid of Honor twice! — I consider myself to be acquainted with the roles of bride and bridesmaid.
As a wedding planner, I also know the qualms that come with poor communication between the bride and bridesmaids, and how easy this is to overcome if everyone is on the same page (really!)
I also recall what it is like to be a bridesmaid for the first time, unsure of what to expect and wondering what the bride expects from me. The bride made sure to go over with bridesmaids and family members exactly what was planned for the months ahead, so that eliminated the nervousness I initially felt.
When the bride and bridesmaids are organized from the beginning, everyone feels more comfortable in their roles as attendants, and this is something I hope to convey to you in this blog post in order to make your wedding planning more stress-free for everyone.
For you, now is a great time to figure out how to introduce bridesmaids to each other (if they aren’t all acquainted yet), plan a few bridesmaid activities, and a few more important to-do’s to keep bridesmaids organized for your wedding.
This list will explain exactly what to do for bridesmaids so everyone is on the same page. This will prevent anxiety from bridesmaids about knowing what to expect from them and will get everyone acquainted with one another. Think about this as a little exercise in bridesmaid icebreakers. :)
Let’s get started: you have a wedding to plan and bridesmaids to fill in on the details! Here is what to do for bridesmaids, starting with that ol’ communication thing. It’s important, to make sure to highlight it!
What To Do For Bridesmaids
1. Make communicating with bridesmaids easy.
Gather bridesmaids’ phone numbers and email addresses.
If you have the contact information of bridesmaids easily accessible, you’ll be more organized in the months ahead. This will also be essential information for sending mass email to your bridal party (e.g. Gmass, which you can try out here, is a helpful option to use). Mass email will help everyone stay connected and is a breeze for you to use! You can format the names of recipients to make it personal, alert bridal party attendants through your email about dates, provide directions to venues, and invite bridesmaids to upcoming activities or icebreakers. You can even share photos through mass email about potential bridesmaids dresses, shoes, wedding details, and so much more.
You can even see who has or hasn’t opened your email yet, and gently following up with them if needed.
You can utilize bridesmaid contact information when sending group texts (but don’t send too many of them, as it can get pretty crazy with notifications), sharing spreadsheets through Google Docs, and inviting guests to upcoming bridesmaid icebreakers or activities so everyone can get to know one another.
How do you connect with your bridesmaids? Everyone has a favorite form of communication, so one thing you can do for bridesmaids that is extremely helpful is to find out which method of communication they prefer.
Use this communication tool when getting in touch with her. For instance, some people prefer Snapchat, while others swear by email.
Some users rely on Instagram to communicate, while others are more interested in a Facebook group to stay connected.
A secret Pinterest board to share ideas with bridesmaids, a private group on Facebook or a group chat are a few ways you can stay in touch with your bridesmaids, provided they use these services and are happy to do so.
Furthermore, some bridesmaids might like to meet in person while others much prefer communication through video chat, due to conflicting schedules, travel time, or COVID.
The bottom line is: find a communication tool that works best with your bridesmaid and use it to keep in touch.
2. Give bridesmaids a small planner or notebook.
This can be a weekly or monthly planner, or a simple inexpensive spiral notebook (these are cute + affordable). It can be very basic: this is not for frills, but for efficiency. The notebooks, with each bridesmaid’s name written on the front, will be a place she can keep track of any notes or upcoming events. You needn’t fill it in yet with important dates, as these dates may change as you get closer (i.e. dress fittings or dress shopping, bridal shower, etc.) This is for her to keep track of things, so she’ll fill it out as needed.
3. Plan upcoming bridesmaid activites.
If you’re wondering how to introduce bridesmaids to each other, it’s easy: plan a few get-togethers! One or a few bridesmaid activities are a great way to get everyone acquainted ahead of the wedding planning festivities. This can be a small brunch, a get-together at your home, dress shopping trip, coffee shop visit, or even a video chat. Keep it short-and-simple, but give everyone a chance to share:
– where they live
– how they know the bride
Introduce your bridesmaids to each other and explain how long you’ve known her, how you met, what you have in common, etc. like a bridesmaids icebreaker.
You can even use this opportunity as a brainstorming session to see what everyone thinks about wedding colors, bridesmaid colors, bridesmaid dress lengths, styles, etc. Just for fun, chat about what kinds of dresses there are to see what your bridal party attendants think about the styles you’re envisioning.
TIP: Send invitations digitally (e.g. this is a great resource for digital invites) to save money, save paper, and keep things more organized for bridesmaids. If they need to respond or refer back to an invitation or activity, it’s all saved on their digital device.
4. Explain exactly what you need from your bridesmaids.
Many of the conflicts that can arise (but not usually, don’t so don’t sweat it) usually are due to a lack of communication with bridesmaids, specifically what is expected in her role.
Bridesmaids can get annoyed if they think the bride expects too much from her as an attendant. On the other hand, the bride can be annoyed if they feel like bridesmaids aren’t participating. And this isn’t anyone’s fault, it is simply because some brides have big ideas in their heads and expect bridesmaids to be mind-readers, while other brides really require little at all from their bridal party attendants but this can be confusing to them if they aren’t sure they are “doing enough”.
This is easy to clear up from the get-go by explaining exactly what you expect from bridesmaids.
And keep in mind, your bridesmaids — your sisters, cousins, best friends, co-workers, colleagues, future in-laws, whatever! — are important people in your life. Don’t overwhelm them by expecting too much!
Here is a reasonable amount of things the bride can expect from her bridesmaids to do:
– attend the bridal shower
– help out with bridal party planning, if needed
– attend the bachelorette party
– help plan the bachelorette party with the Maid of Honor
– buy a bridesmaid dress and get fittings and alterations, if needed
– attend the rehearsal dinner
– arrive at the wedding early to join in on getting ready with the bridal party including hair and makeup
– attend the ceremony and reception
NOTE: Be specific on dates of the major events so she has plenty of advanced notice.
Some brides may add specifics to this list, such as:
– attend a bridesmaids luncheon
– help me pick out the _____ and _____ (but again, be specific!)
– assist in putting together invitations, postage stamps, and mailing them out to guests
Some brides who are super laid-back and fun — all of which I’ve been lucky to have as the brides in weddings where I’ve been a bridesmaid or maid of honor — typically say this:
– please come to the wedding
– wear a fun dress
– have fun + don’t forget to dance!
Nice and easy. As you can see, the style can be very different depending on the bride, what she has envisioned, and what she expects from bridesmaids.
Keep it simple. If you want bridesmaids to wear black shoes, be specific. If you want bridesmaids to keep organized and help you stay on budget, ask. If there is a task you need to delegate, ask upfront if they would be willing to help you figure it out. Want bridesmaids to arrive super-early to get hair and makeup done? Request it early on.
These are all great things to go over with bridesmaids as early as possible to prevent confusion as the wedding day or other related events approach.
TIP: Provide a wedding day-of itinerary so bridesmaids have a hard-copy (or digital, even!) to refer to for the timeline of the wedding.
5. Pick out a cute dress.
Most of the above are things the bridesmaids are helping you with, so let’s now focus on what to do for your bridesmaids. The most important thing, I think, is to pick out a cute bridesmaid dress.
By cute, it should have the following attributes:
– stylish, but a classic choice that can be worn again
– figure-flattering for all shapes and sizes
– no hard rules on heels or hairstyle
– a dress that isn’t too expensive, as bridesmaids usually foot the bill
TIP: For more on this topic, read: Does The Bride Buy the Bridesmaids Dresses?
Choose a dress your bridesmaids will want to wear, may be able to wear again, and most importantly, one that is affordable. Everyone knows the bridesmaid dress is typically worn for one day, and at that, only for a few hours; if there’s a chance the dress can be worn again and won’t cost an arm and a leg, score! They’ll love you for it, tbh. :)
6. Don’t be a nut.
The most basic on our list of what to do for bridesmaids costs zero dollars and means a lot to your bridal party: don’t be a nut.
Your wedding is a beautiful, wonderful occasion and you have exciting days ahead of celebrations to enjoy with your soon-to-be spouse and your wedding party. Don’t wreck it by expecting or demanding perfection; just go with the flow. Don’t be a nut. Nuts turn into bridezillas and that doesn’t look good on anyone.
People will remember if you were a tightly-wound bride with an attitude or a cool, calm, relaxed bride who was looking forward to having fun. Be the latter! It’s way more fun, promise.
7. Give your bridesmaids nice gifts and spoil them with hair and makeup.
Plan to give thoughtful bridesmaid gifts to your wedding party attendants, and if budget allows, cover the cost of their hair and makeup services on the day of the wedding. It is a nice gesture that goes a long way, particularly because they’re doing all of this for YOU. They want you to be happy and have a wonderful memory of your wedding day, so spoiling them as a thank you is a nice way to show your appreciation.
For tips on bridesmaid gift-giving, read:
We hope this helps to make everything a lot easier with your wedding party! Now that you know what to do for bridesmaids and important things to go over with bridesmaids, tell us: what questions or comments would you add?
Tell us in the comment box below!
This is sponsored by Responsival. All opinions are our own.