This is a guest post. Take it away, Katie!
When we talk about wedding planning, brides, planners, friends, and vendors get the most focus. The groom is often skipped because they are not interested or so we thought. The truth is that they may not care for the nail polish you chose or the cake flavor, but let’s hear them out. There are groom responsibilities that we cannot do without, especially if you are thinking of how not to be a bridezilla. These men are sweet and deserve to get involved in wedding planning because it’s also their day. So if you want a balanced wedding planning view, listen to this groom’s guide to wedding planning from real grooms.
1. Be selfless
Wedding planning for guys is fun, but it gets better when you are selfless. It is beautiful when couples go above and beyond to serve each other, and it is necessary now more than ever. Serve your bride by making her as comfortable as you can through the planning process. Sometimes, one of the groom wedding duties is to think for her as she gets overwhelmed with planning. Is she on any kind of medication? Remind her or help fill her prescription without prompt. Serve her meals when you can, a relaxing bath, and other little things that count.
2. Be emotionally supportive.
The groom’s wedding planning starts with offering the most thoughtful gift which is emotional support. You don’t have to say anything or give an opinion all the time, but your presence is a source of comfort because you are her safe space. Foster peace in her environment, listen, encourage, and reassure. She must know that you are on her side at all times. In fact, you are her best sounding board because it is your wedding too. This period also trains you for the marriage ahead.
3. Get realistic! Stress is inevitable
As much as the groom’s responsibilities are to help, wedding planning is not a walk in the park. Accept within yourself that the journey will be stressful. If you see a groom too involved in wedding planning, you see a man that appreciates the tenacity of his bride. Acknowledging the overwhelm of the process opens your mind to problem-solving and growth opportunities. You want to find solutions and make the process easy for her. With unity between both of you, wedding planning becomes easier.
4. Get involved with organizing
The organization process begs the question, how involved should the groom be in the wedding planning? Grooms say he should be very involved. Pulling your weight during the planning process goes beyond saying sweet words, sitting cross-legged, and paying more attention to the television. The bride’s brain is a mass of jumbled information during wedding planning, so help her stay organized. Write down important information, arrange her calendar and notes, set meeting alarms, curate her vendor’s list, and more. Helping the bride organize is one of the ways to show your love.
5. Hire your wedding planning team together
A glowing and healthy bride and groom at a wedding is a result of the wedding team. Hiring a solid team lifts the burden of the bride and she doesn’t run around handing lapses of incompetent vendors. One of the groom’s responsibilities is to sit down with your bride for the hiring process and choose only professionals that make you comfortable. Maintain clear and frequent lines of communication and sleep with both eyes closed.
6. Corroborate on the guest list
Taking care of the guest list is one of the most important tasks in wedding planning for grooms. You are responsible for half of the guests, if not more. So, sit with her, curate the list and make the cuts together. This way, you are helping both of you. You know your friends, and family better than she does, who to invite and let go. Don’t leave her with that burden. Get involved!
7. Develop an interest in everything
Who plans the wedding? The bride does, and we know that she always looked forward to the day. Grooms don’t really care about the stationery design, color palette, seating chart, rustic or coastal theme. Their concern is to be with their brides, come the day. However, you must be present and interested when she needs your opinions. Be sincere about it because she’s the most attentive and intuitive at that point. Tell her what you like, but remind her that she is in charge.
8. Form a barrier and guard your bride
The top task on the groom’s responsibilities guide is to protect his bride. Once the wedding commences, delegate a trusted person to field all the petty issues. The middleman must also approach you first. The bride must not be disturbed. She must be spared from any problem that could put a damper on her big day.
9. Don’t micromanage her
One of the best wedding tips for grooms is the ability to relinquish absolute control during the wedding planning process. As much as she wants and cherishes your presence and input, your word isn’t law. You must listen, compromise, and give her control because it is more of her day than yours. Let the bride bring her dreams to fruition as long as it is within reasonable boundaries.
Why stand on the sidelines when there are tons of groom responsibilities to execute? Why assume what the groom wants when you can hear and incorporate his thoughts? This post curates ideas, thoughts, and tips from real grooms into a guide that will help wedding planning going forward.
About the Author: Kate Motina
Kate heads the Wedding Forward content department. She’s an expert on wedding showers, honeymoon plans, destination weddings, photography, videos, and themes. Give her a wedding vision and she will give you a perfect wedding plan from her fingertips. She also has her unique articles on the site. She is a health and fitness enthusiast, and she’s crazy about photography!