Are you planning an adults-only wedding? Worried you’ll offend someone by NOT inviting kids? Well, guess what?
It’s YOUR wedding and the decision of whether or not to invite kids is completely up to you!
And don’t worry about offending someone, as this decision impacts YOUR budget and your wedding plans, so it’s really no one’s business but your own. :)
And there’s no ‘wrong’ or ‘right’ way: each wedding is different!
There are some pros and cons to inviting kids to a wedding.
Pros and Cons of Inviting Kids to Weddings
PROS TO INVITING KIDS TO YOUR WEDDING
-Adults do not need to find a sitter
-Adults can stay longer (since they don’t have to get home to relieve the sitter)
-The most fun on the dance floor ever (kids love dancing at weddings!)
-The fun of including kids in the festivities (they’ll have memories of your wedding for life!)
CONS TO INVITING KIDS TO YOUR WEDDING
-Adults may actually leave earlier, if the kids are very young
-Increased guest list which increases your overall cost (food, favors, place setting, cake)
-The need for kid-friendly meals
-There may be outbursts from young kids at the ceremony (this never bothers me though!)
Now, after reading this list if you’re still planning to not invite kids to the wedding, sure thing! Here are some ways to nicely indicate that kids are NOT invited to the wedding so there’s no confusion.
How to Invite Guests to an Adults-Only Wedding
There is proper etiquette to follow if you’re inviting guests to an adult-only wedding. For starters, you won’t be coming out and saying it, like “no kids please” on the invite. Ha! Someone once did that (no one I know personally, but a friend of a friend of a colleague) and that doesn’t really go over very well.
Instead, you’ll be indicating it on the invitation like this:
Address Your Invitations to the Adults Only
On the outer envelope of your wedding invitations, you’ll address it with the adults names (no kids names):
Mr and Mrs Ryan Smith
549 Rosebush Lane
Lily Valley, CA 98382
*NOTE: If kids were invited to the wedding, the outer envelope would read, “Mr and Mrs Ryan Smith and Family”.
Then, on the inside envelope, you’ll indicate the names fully:
Ryan and Joanna Smith
*NOTE: If kids WERE invited, the inner envelope would list the names of everyone in the fam: “Ryan and Joanna Smith, Tina, Michael, and Bobby” indicating the kids were invited. Or it would read, “Ryan and Joanna Smith and Family”.
Now, that’s pretty clear to most guests.
And you probably won’t even have to field any questions like, “Are kids invited to the wedding?” Most people understand the invitation is the place where it indicates pretty clearly if kids are or are not invited to the wedding.
Need to take it one step further? Here is another way to politely tell guests kids are not invited to the wedding. Just choose one of the following — not both.
Include ‘Adults Only Reception’ on the Enclosure Card
Now, if you are concerned you’ll have some guests who are still not sure about the indication of no kids invited, some couples choose to indicate the following on their reception enclosure card (which goes inside the invitation):
“Adult only reception”
You can edit any reception card to add this line from here. But you really don’t need to take this step, so it’s not required. We recommend option one strongly, as it is a pretty good indication of who is invited (and tells guests nicely that kids are not invited).
Instead of mentioning it on the enclosure card, you can add “Adult Only Reception” of your wedding website in the area that discusses the reception details. But don’t do BOTH: that just is a little too much, imo. They’ll get the idea. :)
Hope it helps! Have fun!