Home | Letter to the Groom? — Ask Emmaline

Letter to the Groom? — Ask Emmaline

by Emma Arendoski

Every week, or at least twice per month, we receive the same question from brides asking for a “sample” letter to the groom, as in a letter written to the groom the morning of the wedding and what it should say. We won’t name the recent bride — let’s call her “B” — but she wants to know what to say to her groom in a love letter written the morning of the wedding. The answer? We can’t tell you! Every time we get a question like this, we struggle with the right / nice way to tell brides how simple it really is: you DON’T and shouldn’t need a sample letter to the groom. And here’s why…

letter to the groom

via here

Letter to the Groom

You shouldn’t copy a sample letter to the groom because, let’s be honest, he doesn’t want to hear a wedding magazine’s version of what you think of him. He will know that your words, while lovely, don’t quite sound the way YOU would say them. And he wants to hear it from you because you’re the one he’s marrying.

We couldn’t help but run a quick Google search on the topic, and we were surprised at how many queries came up with an actual SAMPLE letter to the groom, word-by-word, what you should say to your groom, in a love letter, delivered to him on the morning of the wedding.

Now, this whole groom gift and/or letter to the groom is a new-ish trend, one I didn’t partake in myself (simply because I didn’t know it existed and I didn’t think of it myself), but still… if you’re embarking on this modern trend, take it up a notch and, you know, use your OWN words. ;)

Go on — tell him how much you love when he doesn’t shave and has a little stubble. Tell him that you are so glad you said yes to that movie date many years ago; tell him how you can’t wait to spend every night Netflixing your favorite new show. Tell him how you can’t wait to see him down the aisle. How you can’t wait to see how handsome he looks in his tux. Be silly. Be unique. Be true. Be you. Don’t copy and paste. For the love of all things wedding, don’t write a sample letter to the groom.

On our search, we were surprised at the vast sample letter to the groom examples we really found. There’s even a link of ACTUAL fully written sample letters to the groom, as in, copy and paste exactly THIS and write it in a letter to the groom.

We won’t link it, simply because we don’t want to misguide you.

The truth is, you shouldn’t need a sample letter to write your own letter to the groom. Advice? Sure! Guidelines? Of course! Tips? Absolutely! But we never want you to copy and paste something to your beloved on the day of your wedding. You should have confidence enough in the words you have to say.

Here’s some of the things you can include in a letter to the groom:

-a short, handwritten note of why you can’t wait to marry them
-when you knew they were the one for you
-why you’re writing them a letter
-something you love about them — be specific

That’s it.

Keep it short, sweet, and to-the-point… and include a gift with it, if you’re able. Something from here is ideal.

The card or letter to the groom can be written in something like this (available at Ponto Mountain Paper):

letter to the groom

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Why You Don’t Need a Sample Letter to the Groom

Your groom wants to hear it from you, not some wedding magazine.

I know most people searching for a sample letter to the groom because they want it to sound right; they want it to sound good. They want the letter of the groom sample to be what they’re “supposed to” say.

But what it is supposed to say is exactly what comes from the heart… not to sound sappy, but it’s totally true. No one wants to read a love letter written on their wedding day that doesn’t even sound like it is coming from their spouse. They can tell. So don’t do it!

If you’re worried you can’t find the words to say, a simple I love you and Can’t wait to marry you is sufficient, along with an inside-joke or two. Something that makes them smile? Bonus points.

If you want to get creative, print it out for him to keep forever, close at hand in his wallet. This is hand-written in your writing and printed on metal. Cool idea! By Name It Already.

letter to the groom

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Letter to the Groom — A Helpful Hint

Note: Most grooms may not know a letter to the bride / letter to the groom thing exists, if you don’t mention it. Grooms don’t typically spend all day on Pinterest or looking at wedding blogs, and thus, may not know about this little morning of the wedding tradition. Case in point: if you’re someone who wants the groom to write you a letter the morning of the wedding, be sure to mention it to the groom (or pass the request on to his Best Man). And if you want to write a letter to the groom as a surprise, don’t mention it — but don’t necessarily expect one back, as he may not know it’s protocol. ;)

Hint: you can always send a hint by ordering a pair of these cards from Eleven Oh Five.

via here

You’re marrying him; speak from the heart! That’s all that matters.

Hope it helps!

xo
Emma

P.S. Want to pair your letter to the groom with a gift? See gift ideas: How to Find a Gift for the Groom

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